Foreshadowing

I told him that I like hydrangeas
Big bloomy bushes of blue or pink
I like them because they aren't common
No hustler roses, no vague lilies
They were my grandmother's flowers, hydrangeas
What I neglected to say is that they smell of loss and death and things left unsaid.

Wear it like bones, like skin

A man sent this poem to me once. Long ago. He said it captured me exactly. I'll let you decide.

I want a red dress.
I want it flimsy and cheap,
I want it too tight, I want to wear it
until someone tears it off me.
I want it sleeveless and backless,
this dress, so no one has to guess
what's underneath. I want to walk down
the street past Thrifty's and the hardware store
with all those keys glittering in the window,
past Mr. and Mrs. Wong selling day-old
donuts in their café, past the Guerra brothers
slinging pigs from the truck and onto the dolly,
hoisting the slick snouts over their shoulders.
I want to walk like I'm the only
woman on earth and I can have my pick.
I want that red dress bad.
I want it to confirm
your worst fears about me,
to show you how little I care about you
or anything except what
I want. When I find it, I'll pull that garment
from its hanger like I'm choosing a body
to carry me into this world, through
the birth-cries and the love-cries too,
and I'll wear it like bones, like skin,
it'll be the goddamned
dress they bury me in.

by Kim Addonizio

On the Offensive

I've often read that many submissive women are actually in positions of authority and power during their normal lives...work, personal but non-sexual relationships, financial, family hierarchy. It makes sense to me, that being in control creates a desire...no, a need...to throw off those metaphorical shackles in favor of physical shackles.

The slippery slope logic follows, then, that men or women who gravitate towards dominance have the opposite situation. They are weak or powerless in their normal lives, yes?

I don't like to think of it this way, yet so often those I meet (virtually, really, I don't give them much of a shake in terms of meeting in person) are ones with a grudge against the opposite sex, ones who were controlled by their mother or father, ones who don't work, can't provide, have no concept of social responsibility or obligation.

Again, I am saying slippery slope logic, so as not to offend (much). I know there are those who do not fit this description, who are strong simply because they are, not in reaction to being made weak during a formative stage in their lives.

But they are few and far between. I'm not complaining, mind you, I'm just making a statement. I don't mind the wait.

But to any of you who read my blog and who match that description...man up. Sort yourself. Don't take submission as your due simply because you added Sir or Master to an online profile.